Gabe Ruth’s Tips for Juicing

If you're gonna cheat, you better do it right
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The Weekly Bird

GABE RUTH'S TIPS FOR JUICING

Right cheek this time, thanks Gary.
Gabe Ruths
TIP #1

To start things off, make sure you develop a bad temper before injecting steroids into your body.

Introduce some doubt and a police record to throw people off the trail.

DAMN IT!!!
TIP #2

Credit your unnatural improvements to a new health regiment and your faith in God(s).

If new evidence of your cheating comes to light, start quoting scripture.

Thank you dear Lord baby Jesus.
TIP #3

Gabe suggests you find a steroid buddy to juice with.

It also sets him up as a fall guy if anyone finds your stash.

How did those get there? Better dust them for prints and see who touched them last...
TIP #4

Gabe says exercising your core muscles is a waste of time.

Your core was designed to process meats and liquor. Six-pack abs are a myth spread by the homosexual elite.

MmmMMMmmm.
Gabe Ruths
TIME TO HIT THE JUICE
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